Rappers doin’ Housework - Casumo Blog

Rappers doin’ Housework - Casumo Blog

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I have very low standards, but I'm still the one who has to take out the trash before it's overflowing.

I always break first! I also do all the cooking. It's a little frustrating. Shouldn't basic hygiene and feeding yourself be Adulting , not Womaning ?

I lived with a guy that could not lift a finger to do anything. And then he would criticize how I put the pots and pans away, how I hung his shirts I was only 22 and trying too hard.

When I broke up with him he lived alone and we stayed friends. His place was always as neat as a pin and he cooked, too. So it wasn't ever a matter that he couldn't do it, it was that if there was a woman in the house it was HER job.

He married someone a couple of years after we broke up and I assume she had no problem with it. I'm moving in with two of my male friends next week.

One of them is a total mama's boy who until a few years ago wouldn't even eat anything that his mom didn't prepare for him. I'm curious to see how that plays out in terms of doing housework.

That sounds like an interesting time. I hope it isn't too tough of a transition for him and you! I can't even really say if he is a slob or not because his mum does everything for him.

The other guy is extremely neat though, so I think we will manage. The only room I really care about is the kitchen anyway because I'm somewhat of a germaphobe in regards to that, so as long as that is clean I don't care if the rest of the flat is chaos.

I sympathize with being fastidious about the kitchen for instance, it's driving me INSANE that my roommate is accusing all of us of being intolerably messy, even though she piles shit haphazardly in the dishwasher so it doesn't get clean and leaves a thin coating of grease every time she washes a pan , but just for the record, some of the research suggests that a certain number of germs in your kitchen is actually good for you!

I'm actually aware of that, but I'm being very stupid in the whole thing. I'm emetophobic, so everything having to do with food hygiene is a bit of an issue for me.

For example it grosses me out if dish towels are used more than once and I always use new tools for every single cooking step. Now I feel bad for assuming.

People have their things! I certainly have mine. I always have to use spongelike things to wash dishes because I hate the sensation of bristles so much.

Brushing my teeth is a daily struggle, and I'm well aware of how important that is. I'm fully prepared to sit that one out.

I've done it before when my brother thought it is my job to keep the bathroom we both use clean. It was an even-ish split, but also I'm a total slob so I probably made more than my fair share of mess, too.

First time living with an SO right now. I do 90 percent of the housework. Sometimes he will surprise me and do dishes.

Sometimes we will split everything and marathon clean on a weekend, but on a day to day basis, I do the cleaning, picking up, vacuuming, cooking, and dishes.

Some days it pisses me off, other days I'm just like whatever. It works for us. I think if I didn't do things, he'd eventually do them, but we talked and he said "if you want it done right now, you do it, if you don't care when it gets done, leave it and I'll do it when I feel like".

Kinda does make sense. My bf is exactly the same way. He says that I prioritize cleaning and care more about a clean house than he does, so it's not his prerogative.

If I ask him to do the dishes, he will, but I'm lucky if it gets done the same day. He waits until he's out of clean socks to do laundry if I haven't done it.

That's the thing that pisses me off about this arrangement though is that your boyfriend will never have to worry about the house getting cleaned if he doesn't do it, whereas you don't have that luxury.

I'm pissed because this is what's going to happen with me and my boyfriend when we move in together, given the state of his gross apartment.

Yea, it irritates me too. As of right now, I honestly don't mind doing most of the cleaning. We have a small apartment and I can clean the place top to bottom in under 2 hours, less when I'm good about doing minor stuff throughout the week.

Also, I'm home M-F at 4 and am off on weekends, whereas he works retail and is all over the place with his schedule, so it really is easier for me to do the cleaning.

But that's not going to last forever, we're eventually going to live in a bigger place and a house, so I don't want this to become the norm.

He's usually pretty good about doing stuff if I ask. But it has to be for a specific thing, like take out the trash today.

If I say, OK taking out the trash is your duty, when you see it needs to be taken out, take it out, he won't do it.

He wants to be told, which is frustrating because no one tells me to do anything and I still figure it out!

I ended a 2-year relationship for that reason, and didn't start many others. It remains my biggest relationship fear.

When I was a kid, I grew up being told that I'm just like my dad, and I see the relationship my parents have. My dad worked all the time, and my mom stayed home until we were in middle school.

Then she went back to work, but never made too much. It made sense that my mom did all the housework when we were kids, but then she was working 40 hours a week, and she was still doing all the housework.

My dad has his "man cave" where he goes to relax after his hard day of work, and my mom hides cabinets full of craft supplies around the dining room.

Now my mom works 40 hours a week, and my dad is retired, and she still does the vast majority of the housework. I grew up feeling guilty every time I wasn't helping my mom to clean, but also hating domestic work, and never wanting that for myself.

I am a sloppy, messy person. My desk is made of clutter. But it's important to me to live in a home that I can invite other people to, where the common areas are usable and neat, and nothing is more than an hour-clean away from being ready for company.

I have all these cheaty hacks I do to prevent myself from having to clean. I don't wear shoes in the house. I eat hunks of cheese for dinner on paper towels so I don't have to do dishes.

Once I moved in with a boyfriend who also hated cleaning. He was looking for work while I had a full-time job. I wasn't expecting him to be a home-maker, to keep the whole place scrubbed and have dinner on the table when I got home.

But he did nothing. I'd spend an hour cleaning the place until it looked great, while he sat there and did nothing to help, and he couldn't even just keep it that way.

I'd go to work, come home and find mess everywhere. He'd leave disgusting stuff caked over all the dishes, and mess spilled off of his desk and into a circle around him on the floor.

If I didn't do the cleaning, it didn't get done. Once, I had a second degree ankle sprain, and tore my hand open and needed stitches. My mom said she was coming over to help me, and I spent an hour crawling around our apartment trying to get it at least vaguely presentable before she arrived, and he just didn't help.

I told her about it when I dumped him and went to stay with them for a weekend so he could have some space. I told her about how I did all the cleaning, and I was the one who worked full time, while he was just sitting at home playing video games.

And she just said "Is that all? Honey, those kinds of things are never equal. I'm dating a woman now. She also hates cleaning as much as I do.

But she sees me doing it, and she feels that same guilt that I feel when someone else is cleaning up after me, and she cleans too.

It's not equal, because these kinds of things never are. But we both feel equally responsible for the state of our home. And we both realize the chore that you're dumping on someone else when you don't help them keep your house neat.

Living with other people is always hard. But goddamn if there something that isn't uniquely terrible about living with a man who doesn't feel it's abnormal for the woman to do all the cleaning.

We had been roommates before so he knew I was messy and could ignore mess for much longer periods than most people. When we first moved in together as a couple we split everything and would do it at the same time to motivate each other.

We share the housework. It was never up for discussion that we would split the work in the household, just things like "doing dishes is worse then doing laundry" "no its not", " bla bla bla", "blubb".

I wouldn't say we've split the chores evenly but I honestly prefer to do the ones that need to be done more frequently because I know they will get done.

I do the dishes, laundry, and cleaning the bathrooms, while my husband does the cooking, mowing the lawn, and vacuuming.

Now that we have a dog that sheds we seem to have to vacuum more often. In my relationship, it definitely started that way, although I would chalk it up to his lower standards in housework.

He's fine with dirty dishes all over the counter, pet hair all over the carpet, etc. We worked it out after living together for a while.

I'd say I still do more than half, but not much more. It's not like I didn't have warning signs. There was a bathroom trashcan in there but it had gotten full, so for months he and his roommate had just kept throwing trash on top of it.

It was just stuff like toilet paper rolls and empty shampoo bottles, so for him it just wasn't a big deal. I, on the other hand, take the trash out when it gets full My husband grew up richer than me, and they always had a maid.

He can do housework, but I have found that if we play the waiting game, he has more endurance than I do.

It started with the dishes and ended there. He told me he would do the dishes on his own time. Four months later , I decided that the dishes needed to be done, and I did them.

Unfortunately, that set a dangerous precedent. I kind of like doing the housework. I only have to work part time now, because I do all of the housework.

It was really bad. We used paper plates, cups, and plastic cutlery. I don't think it was either one of our best moments, but I was just trying to see how long it would take.

I didn't because I'm a hardcore feminist and wouldn't put up with that shit. He's also not an entitled manchild so it wasn't a problem. It may sound silly, but I really think this is one of the main reasons I never got married I'm almost 50 now and consider that ship to have sailed.

All of the boyfriends I lived with and could have married were completely useless around the house except for the occasional yard work.

I talked to them about it, they would promise to do better and nothing ever changed. One said I should just ask him to do stuff because he's "not a mind reader", but I tried that and would just get a resentful or dismissive response.

I won't be turned into a nag. By the way, I would have no problem with being a homemaker if I didn't have to work.

But none of these men wanted me to quit my job; I was the higher earner in every case. There was just no way I was going to spend the rest of my life as an unpaid domestic servant, and I never figured out a way to twist it around in my brain to make it feel okay like a lot of women seem to be able to do.

It's not that I lack a nurturing side - I just can't be in a relationship where one party is benefiting WAY more than the other. The men in my life seemed to think that just being around was sufficient effort on their part.

No, he's a very clean guy himself. Though I do a lot of the big stuff like vacuuming, bathrooms and dusting because I work part time and he works full time, he has his own set of chores he does.

He picks up after himself, feeds and changes the cat litter, does his own laundry, takes the trash and recycling out and he does the dishes every night after dinner unless he cooks dinner, then I do the dishes.

I did alllll the housework when I was married to my ex husband, dude was a slob. My boyfriends cleanliness and organisation was one of the things I appreciated about him early on.

I do the vast majority of the cooking and cleaning. I don't mind the cooking. He does some cleaning and will do whatever he's specifically asked to do, but it isn't very often and it's a sticking point for us.

I took my vacation in spurts through the summer so I could work part time, so I don't mind doing it for now since it gives me something to do when I'm at home.

But my SO knows his options when I go back to full time plus I'll be doing school part time on the side are either to pull his weight, or help foot the bill for a cleaner, because I'm not doing it all forever.

I've been living with my boyfriend for a few years. I cook on weekdays and do the laundry and grocery shopping. He cooks at the weekends and cleans up the kitchen each evening after dinner putting things in the dishwasher, washing what can't go in there, wiping down the surfaces, etc.

We each think that the other does most of the cleaning, so it probably works out fairly evenly. He'd been living independently for over a decade when we moved in together, so that helps.

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